A relaxed, informal couple of hours at the Bedford Arms in Balham.

At about 10pm, a man staggered in, carrying a tray and a small panier aloft, like a drunken waiter. The tray was crammed with sandwiches and covered in clingfilm. He chose a seat, sat down, and pulled out a can of Tennants Extra – at which point it became clear that he was a pisshead who had wandered into some function at another Balham pub, spotted a big tray of sandwiches, picked them up and walked out. Marvellous.

For a while, he was simply content with having transported the sandwiches from one venue to another.

Then he started tucking in.

And then, to his credit, he started offering them around to the assembled throng.