I was awoken by an incoming text message at 7.30am, from Mick. “At the Taj Mahal. It is nice, but to be honest it ain't all that.” I know it sounds as if he's referring to a curry house in Cwmbran, but a) the Taj Mahal in Cwmbran isn't open at 7.30am, and b) he lives in India, so I can only assume he was in front of the Taj Mahal. I've not been, myself. I've not been further east than Moscow (which is 37º40' East) nor further west that Porto (which is a piddling 8º36' West.) This represents a pathetic longitudinal range of 46º 16', which I'm not particularly proud of. If anyone would like to boast that they've been to both Petropavlovsk and Anchorage, feel free. Made me feel even more longitudinally challenged.

I was in Shepherd's Bush last night, at a hitBACK Records meeting, at which very little was discussed, other than the issue of co-investor Nick Hobbs presenting a talk at the International Live Music Conference this weekend on “Breaking New Bands”. This is particularly ironic as Nick Hobbs has probably the worst track record of breaking new bands of any vaguely respected music manager. He leafed through the NME incredulously. “Who's this? The Bravery? Who are they?” I had no idea. I thought he said “The Bakery”, which is a far better name for a band. You could release albums called “Seeded Bloomer” and “Wholemeal Bap” and the five members of your band could have nicknames of Yeast, Flour, Salt, Sugar and Water. Yeast would have to be on vocals. Salt on drums. The Bravery, though. That's rubbish. Not least because Bravery doesn't really work as a singular noun. “Some Bravery” might work. I could write to their management to suggest such a thing, but I'm lacking in bravery. Has anyone seen my bravery?

Almost as annoying is a hotel on Shepherd's Bush Green called “Grantly”, which to me just looks like a hideously unwieldy adverb. “He grantly handed over a cheque for £402.35.” The more I look at it the more I dislike it. Perhaps I should indulge in a touch of aversion therapy.

GRANTLY

No. That didn't work.

[EDIT: Regarding the international date line: The earliest reference to the circumnavigator’s paradox is found in the works of the Syrian prince and geographer-historian Isma‘il ibn ‘Ali ibn Mahmud ibn Muhammad ibn Taqi ad-Din ‘Umar ibn Shahanshah ibn Ayyub al Malik al Mu’ayyad ‘Imad ad-Din Abu ’l-Fida (1273 - 1331). Sorry Isma'il, can you just spell that for me? Cheers.]