A force-something gale woke me at about 6.15am this morning, blowing an irritating major 7th chord through gaps in my double-glazing, which are still under a five year guarantee. I really should ring the company and get them to come around and fix it, but I only ever think about ringing them when the wind is blowing an irritating major 7th chord through gaps in my double-glazing – and by the time they come around to fix it, the wind is likely to have died down. How do you find paper-thin gaps in window seals when there's no wind? These were the kind of thoughts that prevented me from getting back to sleep.

An interesting item on the news on Radio 4 this morning. Apparently, a study has shown that using mobile phones doesn't increase your risk of getting a tumour in your head. They later qualified this by saying that, in fact, there WAS an increased risk on the same side of the head that the mobile phone is used on, but this was outweighed by a similar decreased risk on the opposite side of the head. I'm still unclear what this means. Does it mean that I'm OK to keep using my Motorola V3, and that I might get a tumour on the left side of my head, but I'll get some kind of minus tumour on the right side of my head? Does holding a mobile phone to your head actually decrease your risk of getting a tumour, but only in certain bits of your head, while other bits rage with tumescence? Either way, it doesn't really sound as if using mobile phones doesn't increase your risk of getting a tumour in your head.